Bo's Vacation Tutorial For Disney Noobz - Part 5 - An Obsession Interim

So today we're going to profile Disney's Animal King-

What's that?

You want to hear more about the obsessive collecting phenomena that Disney can drag you into?

Well, I suppose we can talk about that.  Here's a quick list, from least to most expensive, of items which are completely useless in the "real world" that Disney will try to get you and/or your offspring to buy while on vacation.

1.  Sorcerers of the Magic Kindom cards.  We already talked about these a bit.  Despite being the newest of Disney's collectible sensations, they are also the cheapest.  You can receive a pack of new (5) cards every time you visit the Magic Kingdom without any additional cost.  Now, you can buy some cards, a nifty folder to carry them in and, I kid you not, a t-shirt which is designed to give you a "power boost" when playing the game, but there's no requirement that you spend any money (other than the park admission you've already ponied up) to play the game.

2.  Character Autographs*.  When meeting celebrities, it is traditional to ask for an autograph.  That goes for animated celebrities, as well.  This is also a cheap collection option because all you really need is a pen, some paper, and time to visit the characters.  However, once again, there can be hidden "upcharges".  For instance, Disney offers a variety of themed autograph books.  They also sell large pens which are easier for characters to use (you try writing with 4 fingers, and gloves!).  Then there's the annoying pain of waiting in line to meet characters unless you shell out for a character meal.

3.  Pressed Pennies.  Remember those old time penny squishing machines they have at theme parks where you put in two quaters and a penny, turn a crank, and out pops a cool flattened penny with something imprinted on it? Those are neat, right?  And harmless?  Yeah, well Disney's taken them to a whole other level.

Sadly, pennies are just a gateway drug to pressed quaters and other heathen inventions.

(No, I'm not kidding about pressed quarters, those cost $1.25)

These penny mushing kiosks are everywhere.  There are literally hundreds of them on property, most cleverly themed to the ride or country or hotel or store or whatever that they happen to be around.  Sure, you think, it's just a penny.  You can afford those!  But remember, it's actually 51 cents...and those quarters add up my friend.  Dear God, do they add up.  By the time you're shelling out the money to buy an official Disney themed pressed penny book (or, heaven forbid, two) you have already contributed your vending machine candy money for an entire month.  And for what?!

Cool looking pennies, no longer useful as legal tender.

4.  Pins. 

No, not those.  Those are special celebration pins that are given out for free at your resort front desk.  If you're celebrating something (for instance, a First Visit), you should definitely wear your celebration pin.  No, I'm referring to the ubiquitous Disney collectible pins

Oh, my God, the PINS!!!!

Way back when the Handlers made their first trip to Disney World together, pins were a new thing.  People didn't really know what to do with them, and trading them with random strangers (which is what you're supposed to do) seemed a foreign concept.  Now pins are everywhere.  There are whole stores full of pins.  Pretty much every cast member you see will be wearing pins on their person, even if the pins are not appropriate for their costuming.

Here we see some friendly Norwegian cast members street hustling pins to young, impressionable children. 

So what, you think, they're just pins.  How much can they cost?

Quite a bit actually.  These are not cheap investments.  Some can be over $10 each, though many are less. Regardless, if you're interested in trading, you'll want to stock up on a few so as to have something to interest your potential trading partners.  Plus, if you want to trade, you'll probably want to invest in a lanyard to carry said pins and to identify yourself as a potential trader to others (if you just want a souvenier and do not want to trade, do NOT put your pins on a lanyard!).  Some people get seriously obsessed with the pins.  Those are the folks staked out at the designated pin store areas with large fabric binders full of the prickly little things (yes, you can buy those too). 

Unlike the other things on this list, it's nearly impossible to avoid Disney pins.  Either you or someone in your family is going to want them, and that's pretty much just that.  So, if you're going to buy pins, and you want to keep them, I suggest you invest in these special backings (not the black ones, the gold colored ones in the lower left):

Found whereve pins are sold.  Which means everywhere.

These are lockable backings which will prevent your pins from falling off as they are wont to do (the Handlers picked up 2 errant pins during our vacation).

Also, if before your trip you think you'll want to trade pins (God help you), you can buy some cheap off of eBay (make sure they're official Disney pins and not knock-offs, traders know the difference) to trade for better pins in the parks.

5. Vinylmation.  Not content with making you pay exorbitant amounts for tiny metal brooches, Disney is also big on encouraging you to pay exorbitant amounts for vaguely mouse-shaped molded plastic figures. 

This was the Handlers' first vinylmation of the trip.  It's a goat thingy. Possibly reminiscent of some Disney ride.  The Matterhorn?  God knows.

 

Luckily, these have not taken off quite as well as the pins.  This is likely because you can't really exchange them between guests and/or cast members.  Currently, there are only a few locations you can exchange them for a "mystery vinylmation".  How does that work?  You go to the register at one of the stores that offers vinylmation trading and you offer up your already purchased vinylmation.  They will show you a box with a bunch of numbers and you pick two.  Then you get to choose one of the two vinylmations in those numbered boxes to take with you, and you leave your old vinylmation behind. 

What can you do with your vinylmation other than trade it for different vinylmations?  Well, you can't wear it.  They're not really that fun to play with, unless you buy a whole bunch (and they're about $10 each). You can throw them at the cat, I guess. Handler 2 keeps his in his office.  How professional.

6.  Duffy stuff.*  No not Daffy, he's a Warner Brothers duck.  This is Duffy, the Disney teddy bear.  Never heard of him?  Neither has most of North America, but he's HUGE in Japan.  So, you can buy a Duffy bear, that is really indistiguishable for any other stuffed teddy bear...except for the outfits.  You know how some people like to dress up their dogs?  Well, this is the teddy bear for them.  He's got a bevy of themed outfits for you to choose from.  You know...if you're into furries...that like wearing costumes.  Now you know why he's big in Japan.

7.  Monorail train sets. Just....don't start.  Don't.  First because this stuff can get seriously expensive.  A lot of it is discontinued and only available on eBay for ungodly prices.  But second, because it will make your basement look like this:

There are other obsessive items to be wary of, but these are the most common collectibles to avoid if at all possible.  Good luck with that.  Disney has made billions off of banking on you and/or your children wanting to "catch em' all".  Resistance if futile.

*Sadly, these are the only collectible items described in this list that Handler 2 does not collect.