Day 5 - Paris - Where the Throngs and the Songs Continue

For our 1st full day in Paris, we went out looking for an authentic Parisian experience. We decided on having a petite dejeuner Francais (breakfast) at a real Parisian cafe.


Handler 1 had pain au chocolat for the third morning in a row, and Handler 2 had a croissant. How French is that?!

Our first stop of the day was the artist collective of Monmartre. We decided to ride the funiculr to the top of the hill partly because it's a bit of a climb up, and partly because it was included on our metro passes, but mostly because funiculars are cool! It's fun to say, too. Funicular. Hee hee.

All the way up to the Bsilica de Sacre-Coeur.

Eh, hving just seen Notre Dame the day before, we were not all that impressed. We also examined the crypt beneath the basilica, which contained this morbid stained glass window, which foreshadows the sights which awaited the Handlers later in the day.

The Handlers then wound their way down the hill and through Montmarte, to the famous Moulin Rouge.

Not as impressive as in the movies.

Next on the Handlers' list was the catacombs. For those not in the know, a long time ago Paris intellectuals were trying to figure out why everyone was getting sick all the time, and someone eventually came up with the idea that it might have something to do with the overcrowded cemeteries in the heart of the city. So, in a tremendous act of civic "improvement", the entire cemetery of Les Innocents was exhumed and reburied in stone quarries. These became the catacombs, now a major tourist attraction!

After long flight of steps down (No seriously, what is it with Parisians and spiral staircases? The Handlers have been up and down so many in the past few days they're getting dizzy!) and about a kilometer long jaunt through spooky drkened hallways in the quarry rock, we came to the main attraction...the bones.

Yeah, it's kind of spooky. Walls and walls of that stuff, sometimes stcked into interesting patterns. After arising from the depths, Handler 1 had no other plans for the day. She's been trying to keep the sightseeing to 3 items a day, but as Handler 2 pointed out, it was only 4:30. There should be lots of time to get additional sightseeing done before dinner. So off we went!

We started with the Place du Concorde, which is what the Parisians (glass is half full people that they are) named this square after they had used it to publicly guillotine first their royal overlords, and then their original revolutionary leaders.

We stopped by the Seine, for an obligtory photo, before continuing on through the Tuileries gardens.

Next we went to view the outside of the Louvre (which ws closed) to make Handler 2 feel better about all he missed yesterday. The Louvre really is just too big to do in one sitting. We passed by a part of the museum where you could see inside...to a wing we didn't even set foot into the day before.
We also stopped by the most famoud place in France (that isn't there anymore). The Place de Bastille, marking approximately where the Bastille prison used to stand before it was razed. By this time Handler 2 was hungry, which apparently made his feet hurt more, so it was time for dinner.

The restaurant, which Handler 1 chose from it's description in her Frnce travel book, is situated right next to a circus, and is filled with evil clown paranphrenalia.

Dinner at the Clown Bar was actually very good. The proprietor there was very nice to us even though we were way early for diners in Paris (he actually rn out of the restaurant after seating us and quickly came bck with bread to serve!). He explained the menu, and even gave us drinks on the house! Afterwards we heded back to the hotel, knowing we had to start packing and getting ready for tomorrow. However, we made a stop off at the local gelato place first. One thing is certain, America needs more gelato!

Gingerbread on the left, Raspberry and Chocolate on the right, both scooped into flower shapes..

Tomorrow, we hop an early train for Metz, where we'll pick up the vehicle we'll be driving around the rest of France. If all goes well, maybe I'll be feeling good enough to show up in a few photos this time (I know that's what you've all bee waiting for).

Day 4 - Paris

Okay, okay....for those of you wondering why there aren't more pictures of me, I have to admit I've been a little indisposed ever since I got here and have been sticking close to the room. However, I have been dutifully sending out my Handlers every day to make certain that we have excellent blog material. I hope to be back on my feet (literally) soon.

The Handlers were up bright and early this morning, picking up a walking breakfast from the local boulangerie, and heading out to their first site of the day; the Musee de Cluny.




Handler 2 was very unhappy to find out that it was not, actually, a museum in celebration of Clooney, his favorite actor (and man crush). Unfortunately the Cluny (whose other name is the Musee du Moyen Age) contains artwork from the middle ages. It's claim to fame is the beautiful "Lady and the Unicorn" tapestry series (which is in a dark room and does not translate well to photography).

This museum is housed partly in a 15th century abbey, and partly in Gallo-Roman baths. Unfortunately, the baths area was closed. But here's a part of the former abbey below.


There were some really detailed and amazing examples of stained glass as well.

For all our fencing peeps, a medival instruction booklet.

After the Cluny, it was time for a little religion. We were heading for the famous Notre Dame cathedral. On the way, Handler 2 spotted this cool fountain!

Arriving at Notre Dame, we decided to begin our tour with a trip up into the towers to see the giant bells. As this required us to stand in yet another seemingly endless queue, we decided to grab lunch. We had yet more ham and cheese sandwiches (with brownies) which were really quite good, and easy to eat while standing in line.

We finally made it to the front and entered the towers. Once again, there was no elevator option.

Taking a breather.

Once up on the roof (some 400+ steps later), we were treated to another spectacular view, and a bunch of gargoyles.

No, I mean it, there were a LOT of gargoyles.

Back on the ground, and legs shaking, we decided to hurry through the rest of our tour of the cathedral, as there wasn't much time left in the day, and we still had much of Paris to explore.

It was now time to move inside. Notre Dame may not be as big as some other cathedrals (Canterbury, which both Handlers have been to before, comes to mind), but it does have it's charms.

Here's another spectacular shot of the interior. Cathedrals just seem to lend themselves to black and white photography. Handler 1 was very pleased and thinks she got a number of "wall hangers".

Having seen our fill of churches for one day, we decided to move on to more secular entertainments. We arrived at the Louvre museum and this skylight, which is also a chalice...or a metaphorical representation of woman....or the focus of a sloppily written Dan Brown novel. Or, you know, it could just be a skylight.

Unfortunately, we only had few hours to give to the massive, unending, cournacopia of art that is the Louvre, but we did manage to hit the "Louvre Trifecta".

First up, the Venus de Milo.

Next, Nike. Winged Victory for those of you familiar with Greek. A sports shoe for those of you more familiar with fashion.

And....the main attraction....the lady with the enigmatic smile who needs no introduction...

There were a couple other things to see there, too. Like this really bored classical sculpture.

Meh.

Handler 2, who is a classics freak, wanted to spend more time at the Louvre string at status of naked women. He claims it's from a love of scholarship....whatever. He will have to be content with what little time we were able to spend.

Tomorrow we close out Paris and the next day, move on to less urban (if not necessarily greener) pastues.

Interesting Fact of the Day: Quote of the day was unfortunately forgotten.

There is a roulette channel in France....where you can bet by phone...on CGI roulette....that is all.

Day 3 - A Tale of Two Arcs

As promised, today I and the Handlers visited one of the most impressive private residences in Europe, the beautiful palace of Versailles.

Knowing what scoundrels the Handlers are, the folks at the castle didn't want to let them in.

No really, they were in line for, like, an hour. In the hot sun! It was not the most pleasant of experiences.

This is Louis XIV, France's "Sun King".

Louis built all of Versailles as a monument to his giant....ego. Apparently, he was focused on building a residence that would just impress the heck out of all the other rulers of Europe. That's why we get amazing things like the Hall of Mirrors.

Here's Louis' big backyard. The handlers can attest, it is big. And hot. And with not a lot of refreshments.

There's a swimming pool.

(I'd just like to point out that the Grand Eaux Musicles we paid extra to see was more of a Petite Musicales...no water.)

And an orange grove.

And here's an "outbuilding".

The Petite Trianon, which we didn't have time to enter.

It's good to be the king.

Up next was one of the major reasons that Handler 1 planned this trip for early October. She wanted to add the Hippodrome du Longchamp to her list of famous racecourses she's visited.

We were here because today was the running of the Qatar Prix du Arc de Triumph. That's like Europe's Kentucky Derby....except its a mile and a half long....and run on grass...and the horses run in the opposite direction...but other than that, it's just like Europe's Kentucky Derby.

Being as how we were late ticket buying plebes, we weren'texactly able to get good seats. However, we did find a corner near a window with a good view of the stretch.

For those who care (pretty much none of you), the race was won by a German mare named Danedream, in course record time!

After our first "arc" we returned to out hotel for some rest, then headed out to find a cafe for dinner. We ended up at a little rugby themed eatery, where Handler 1 finally got a glass of wine. The food was good, better than what you'd expect from a sports bar.

After that we wound our way through the streets of Paris to the Arc de Triomphe (our second of the day).

Unfortunately, there was not an elevator option at the Arc.

There wsn't much to do at the second Arc other than stare up the Champs Elysees,, so we just took some photos of the nice scenery and returned to our hotel. Well, we did stop for gelato on the way. It was good.

Quote of the day:

"This guy's an ass!" - Referencing Louis XIV, the Sun King

Bo Does Europe! - Day 1 and 2

Day 1 began at Detroit Metro Airport are 5pm. After that ensued a flight to La Guardia in New York, a shuttle to JFK, a plane to Heathrow, a number of terminal trams at Heathrow, and finally, a quick plane flight to Paris. Absolutely no wrinkles arose during the travel. Nothing was delayed, the flights were smooth, and the customs person in Paris didn't say a word, but rather passively stamped our passports without even looking at them.

Apparently, Parisian customs workers make Canadians seem paranoid.

While we were on the planes we managed to identify a number of famous landmarks from the air, including:

- The Empire State Building
- Windsor Castle
- The Eiffel Tower
- IKEA!

Here's the Handlers waiting outside Charles de Gaulle for the shuttle to their hotel (I wasn't allowed out of the bags yet).


Catching our second shuttle of the day, we were dropped off outside a hotel and directed to the entrance by our driver. Unfortunately, it was the wrong hotel, and we had to trudge up the street a bit to the next one. There, the very helpful desk lady (who apparently ws waiting for us), gave us keys without asking for any sort of check-in or credit card....once again, the French turn out to be strangely lax/accomodating.

Here's our lovely room.

That's seriously the entire room.

And this is the view from our window.

Handler 1 was....not overjoyed, to say the least, but a bit too tired to make a fuss.

After a much too brief nap, we all headed out to see one of the two sights of Paris that are open late. Here's a hint, it wasn't the Arc de Triomphe.

As is her wont, Handler 1 began taking about a billion photos to be able to prove that she had, in fact, been to Paris.

Big Eiffel Tower is Big.

The Handlers were starving, so they picked up some sandwiches from the little kiosks under the tower and proceeded to eat French baguettes on the lawn next to it. If that's not a prosperous opener to our French excursion, I don't know what is.

There was an adorable double-decker carousel near the base of the tower, and another one just across the Seine. As per the grandhandler's prior observations, carousels are just f-ing everywhere in Paris.

Periodiclly, the whole tower would light up like a twinkling Christmas tree and the hundreds of people gathered on the Champ de Mars to watch would clap.

After that, we made our way up into the tower and got a much closer look at the imposing structure.

Handler 2 was having a great time viewing Paris from above!

That was until he realized Handler 1 had purchased tickets to go all the way up.

Tomorrow we head off for Versailles. Let's see if the Handlers can navigate the French train system on very little sleep!

You Learn Something New Every Vacation

The handlers have been doing significantly more research for this trip than they have for previous vacations, and in the process they have come across a number of interesting facts about the places we're going (or traveling in general). To tide you over until the real reporting begins, I thought I'd give you a rundown of 10 pearls of wisdom the handlers have recently picked up.

1. It's really hard to rent an automatic transmission car in France.

The handlers did manage to do this after significant trial and error, but they're paying double, going 45 minutes out of their way, and incurring about $10 in termination fees as a result of having to change train reservations. Incidentally, we have now added "Metz" to our list of locations we're visiting. Where is Metz? It's a city in France, about 45 minutes from where we actually want to be.

2. Italian opera houses have seats which are located in spots from which the stage cannot be viewed. They are called "Listen Only" seats.

What is the point of that?! You might as well call them "save your money and buy a radio" seats.

3. For some reason it is very popular to visit the Eiffel Tower Monday through Wednesday. The weekends, however, are totally open.

The French, perhaps confused by their state mandated 35 hour work week (More trivia! Don't you wish you were French?), seem to think that Mondays are for puttering about the country visiting national landmarks.

4. Some hotel room safes can be opened with the code 000000.

Yes, hotel managers are just that lazy. Perhaps it's the 35 hour work week.

5. American credit cards won't work in a lot of European machines. Similarly, American debit cards won't work in a lot of European ATMs.

Joy. In case you're wondering, we did look into getting cards that will work on the continent...they are cost prohibitive.

6. French language "Survival Phrases" tutorials desinged to help English speakers get around in France seem to think it's important for one to learn how to ask, "Do you speak German?"

I have no words, other than nien!

7. French numbers stop making sense after 69 (stop sniggering, you juveniles).

No really, seventy in French is actually "Sixty Ten". Eighty is even worse, it's "Four Twenties". Ninety-seven? "Four Twenties Seveteen".

8. Contrary to popular belief, Moussolini did not actually make the trains run on time.

Turns out Fascists aren't good for anything after all.

9. In Paris there is a point where Rue Nicolas Flamel intersects with Rue Perenell.

Harry Potter fans, eat your hearts out.

10. According to trail signs, it is unadviseable to wear high heels while hiking the Cinque Terre.

We'll keep that in mind.

Anywhoo, 24 days to go. Time to get with the packing (Handler 1 has composed a list with over 50 non-clothing items).