So, a long time ago, a wee BJ took a road trip with his father all across the Eastern US, seeing things like Civil War battlefields, and monuments and other things that would normally bore a 10 year old kid. Unsurprisingly, I wasn't a normal kid, and actually enjoyed such dry trips. This isn't the story of what I saw on that trip.
This is the story of the torture of a child.
You see, my father was quite the protective sort, and took it upon himself during this trip to make sure that I was healthy. This took the form of dosing me with cough syrup at the merest mention, nay--whisper, of a cough. This was a problem because I was a child with allergies who coughed frequently and involuntarily.
I wish I could say that this wasn't a formative experience, but I would be lying if I didn't say that I began to dread the taste of that vile orange concoction to such a degree that even a glimpse of that bottle years later is the source of a tightness in the throat as I attempt to supress an involuntary gag reflex. Whether or not I was actually sick at the time is not the point. The point is, to this day, I cannot take liquid medications. I'm pretty sure that psychiatrists call this condition "PTSD".
The point of this story is that my dear, loving, ever understanding wife knows this story, knows how I feel about cough syrup. Not three hours into our trip, as we're driving, I make a small cough after taking a drink of Coke.
She immediately says "I brought some Nyquil, if you need it".
What are the grounds for justifiable homicide?
You're such a weenie.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, when we left you had pink eye, and we had to treat that. Then, in Philly, you were coughing so much you couldn't sleep. We gave you Triaminic (children's version!) and it worked. You stopped coughing. So what if it tasted like rooster pee?
Get over it.
I most certainly will not. I will nurse the grudge until it becomes an all consuming rage, and then one day, when you're too weak to fight back, the cough syrup will come out.
ReplyDeleteOh, and dare I ask how you know what rooster pee tastes like?
Besides, didn't I say that whether I was actually sick wasn't the point?